18 Januari 2006

I’m being a little melancholic these last few days. It’s probably because of PMS or rainy season or watching Rudi Soedjarwo’s, I don’t know.

Yesterday I got an SMS from my very best friend, told me that she (finally) will be engaged this Saturday. I know her like forever and I… I’m just so happy for her.

It’s kind of even things because just last week I heard about another best friend of mine canceling her engagement. We (my friends and I except the one who’s actually in it) were so upset. I personally think it was stupid because she did it for what I thought an irrational reason and I still kind of sad—and afraid—if I thought about that. Now, I feel glad and sad in the same time.

And me? I’m doing things un-me. I went out all day on weekend instead of taking a nice nap. I spent two hours in Gelael, alone with a cup of instant capucchino priced 7500 rupiahs, working on stuff I can more comfortably doing at home. I turned off my handphone (not just let it uncharged which sometimes I do when it’s near deadlines).

And sometimes I remember him. It’s ancient history. I’m over him (and he’s obviously over me, haha). It’s just… until now, I can’t seem to care about anyone as much as I used to care about him. And as always, whenever someone’s there, I think of him.

This writing is unfinished. I’m being too melancholic to continue.

PS: I think I said something about writing consistently in Indonesian. *rolling eyes* Well, I write in English because, as Stania said, it’s foolishly less embarrassing. Maybe I’ll write in Indonesian only or English only.

4 komentar:

  1. One of annoying things (to me) in writing English is I keep on checking the grammar. Somehow, I concerned about the grammar more than the writing's substance itself. So I end up editing and changing the sentences on my blog which I found using incorrect grammar (until now!) :p
    Well, additional editing jobs for me...
    But the good thing is I learn more about English usage and find myself opening English grammar textbook more often (so I wouldn't look stupid in the world wide web!).
    Practice makes perfect, so they say.

  2. Anatole France, a French writer who was awarded the Nobel Prize for Literature in 1921, once said: "All changes, even the most longed for, have their melancholy; for what we leave behind is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter into another!"

    He's a satirist after all.

  3. hai Stania! entah lewat Monique atau siapa, ya udah deh kamu dapet salam dari aku aja. :)

  4. hay! what's up, sist? I know that feeling. The feeling that made me walking around Blok-M plaza at one-hot-melancholic night after work-alone of course-and suddenly just sat at Dunkin's, ordered just a bit pricey little cup of hot chocolate, and somehow, started to write! (normally, I prefer to draw).

    Hehe...you gave me that atmosphere.

    PS. It's a lot better to write ALL-consequently in English, kok.. Maksut I, don't campur2 gitu lo..
    (tapi komen gw bukan tentang ini sih..